Im Just Me

2009-06-16T04:08:00.003+08:00

Hmmm...been decades eh, since i updated my blog..hahhaa...now, in the middle of the night, at Toa Payoh Fire Post, im sitting here with my laptop, tapping onto the post's or whoever's internet network, with no ambulance calls, typing this out..hahahhaa.....

Had 2 calls earlier, both chest p'ain, and one of them had a maa faan daughter to talk to...Haiyaa.....well, the rest are "resting" or rather sleeping..hahaha...well, usually, i'de be sleeping too..hehhee...

well, following up on my love-life, it went through an unexpected turn..hehe...turns out, he was into me after all...since the time that i didnt even realise...before mock-test he say..hehehe....wow..that was quite some time ago..i tot it was a "one sided love affair" haha...just like how it was sung by elvis presly...hmmm..now, after a series of events, we are together..and im loving every moment of it..i love you sayang. My one and only Abang Duckie:) Muackss..

hmm..but it has been difficult for us to go out and spend time together...his and my shifts are never the same..though we have 1 day same shift, but at the end of the day, we both are too tired to go anywhere...its always his 1st day, and my last day shift...if im having my off, he will be having his night..when he is having off, ill be having my night..so thats the onli time we can spend time together; though either one of us has to sacrifice our time sleeping to spend time with each other..i dnt mind at all :) as long as im with him..hee....he says the same too..so, it may be true when they say that love can conquer all eh? haha...so, most of the time, ill go over to his hs to spend time together, cos its too tiring to go out..haha..will end up sleeping...both of us i mean..haha! cos both too tired..

hmm....another thing is, i miss the V Club babes :( gurlss....i miss u guys soo much....starbucks and laksa....hmmm...well, soon k babes :) muakss..

2009-05-10T01:49:00.002+08:00

Hmmm....i know this as a fact. and i know that this is what i must and must not do. but i cant avoid doing it. Ive attached myself too much to him...He's someone who ive gotten close to, someone who i share my feelings with, someone who would listen to me.

I thought i could carry on this way; manja with him, sweet talk a lil...

Now i realise, how can i do this. i am being such a bitch. Hes into someone else! dont i get that?! dont make myself regret by going in further into something which i know that is impossible.
Im glad to have known him. that gentleman..haha...and i do pray that he's happy with her :)

2009-05-09T08:31:00.003+08:00

i miss you. i miss you when u left. i miss you wen i cant see you. i miss you wen i hear your voice. i miss you wen i see ur picture. i miss you even wen i was just with you. i miss you now.

my heart thuds erratically when im with you. and it pumps so fast i feel like ive just ended a marathon run. when im not with you, just thinking of you, my heart rate shoots up to 100 beats per minute. And i could feel it beating hard against my chest wall..

Now, i feel, i am going too far in. Its one sided, i would agree very much. And i know that if i go too far in, ill get hurt very badly. Looking back, it hurts me too much. Now. i dont want the same thing to happen. I just pray that i wont go too far in. Please.

2009-05-05T22:09:00.005+08:00

:] SUPER BIG GRIN...heheheheh..im happy today:)

I had a great time out with my babes today..hehe..n yesterday:)
Yesterday went swimming with Mel at toapayoh swimming complex at arnd 7pm...then head to makan at forks n spoons...
Today, is Hidayah's birthday!! wooohoo..happy 21st birthday my dear! muakkmuakksss...
Anway, me n mel headed of to HSA, so that i could go and donate my blood..haha..shes soo patient..waited for me outside there...while i was inside, letting them suck my blood out...hahah!

Then, we left for Joo Seng warehouse, to go buy my FBT sports stuffs:) soo happy! hahahha...got my FBT shorts, and top! hehehe..got a set of 1 black top, n 1 red top+ shorts for Kelvin, a pair of soccer shorts for Fithri; Ashiff's sister, and Mel bought a set of black Top+shorts too:)

I bought 1 black top, and 2 shorts, 1 black, and 1 red. hehehehe.....so happy:) go to the blogshops so maa fan....so irritating the girl...haha...

Then, we left for bugis, had a quick bite at KFC, and jalan2 at bugis village, and waited for Dayah..haha...then, found out the place was kinda in a renovation mode. so nth much to look at..hahaha...
Dayah came, went back to KFC, cos Dayah was hungry:)haha...then headed off to Novena, pizza hut. Faizan blanja!! woohoo! hahahah...well, i had a great time:) will upload the pics soon...hahaa...

2009-05-01T23:00:00.003+08:00

hmm.... at last. i can really see that im trying. trying soo hard to let go. i cant believe ive deleted all pictures of him from my phone..
haa! at last! and ive taken off the rings that i either wore it on a chain around my neck, or on my finger. im still gathering the courage to delete off his msgs. When i read tem again, i feel my heart wrenched..but i know and i admit that its really over.

I also realise, i do like AK. hahahha...wat he msged me on Friday night was something that shocked me. But i liked it. I would admit to that..*blushes* hee!~

but i dnt want it to end the same way. God i beg you. Please.

2009-04-27T23:27:00.002+08:00

I Loved you then, i love you now, and ill love you tomorrow. but, i now know of whats going on. And ive resoluted, to let you go. im hurting myself more thinking of you aren't i? and knowing this, shocked the heck out of me.

take care my dear. may you be happy.

2009-04-23T23:15:00.003+08:00

I woke up today, with a stuttered heart, knowing that ill be facing him. I didnt know what to expect. Really. I assumed that it would be akward, silent and heart breaking.

I stepped in, and there he was, by the door. I ignored him, feeling like as if my legs have turned into jelly, and i had to hold on to Citi to stabilize myself. I tried to act normal, but i could hear my laughter and my voice was shakey. I tried to cover up my shaking, by laughing as much as i can, and smiling.

I don't know if what i felt and saw was true. But i wish that it wasn't. Cos it onli hurts me more thinking about it. I know you too well. You had a choice. But you chose the longer way. I was shocked. I thought i was just paranoid and feeling the akwardness getting into me. Bu maybe what i felt was true after all.. But dont. I beg you. Dont do this to me. I dont think i could go through with it again.

2009-04-22T23:13:00.003+08:00

Im starting to let go..bit by bit..i can feel that..i think i noe why..Since i met AK. Though he's not that good looking, and his sense of humour is abit off, hahaha...but..im comfortable with him. I feel obligated to hold on to my love for you. but i can feel it slipping away, since the love is onli one sided.. I dont know wat to feel. AK is a very nice guy, but i know, from my memories with you, i shouldnt feel this way towards him. Hmmm....What should i do... i want to get over you. but i can do that onli if i get distracted. and AK is here. But i know i cannot cont feeling this way. Becos it would somehow turn ot the same way.

Oh God, please, let my heart rest. Let it stitch back the tiny fragments of whatever that was thorn apart. I beg you. dont test me again. i dnt think i can take it. I dont think i have the strength to go through that kind of test again. Let me be.

2009-04-18T19:09:00.002+08:00

Ive just realized. She wont be in the same school as us anymore. I know. what im thinking iis very wrong, and selfish. But i cant help but be happy with this train of thoughts. She wont be there all the time. Period. ..

But i do wish that he is happy. And would be happy in the future.
Sorry for my selfish thoughts..

2009-04-16T22:36:00.002+08:00

Im happy. At least for now, that im distracted. School is once more a place for me to let my mind wander away..hahhaha...day dreaming lah tu...i missed my mates...Zwan, Aiiiniiiii, Shasha, Devi, Rajes Aka...hmmm.....but my new classmates rocks too! hahhaha...had sooo much fun...These past few days, it feels like we've knwn each other since like whenever.. theres onli like 30 of us, plus 1 today...so...its 31..and theres onli 1 class!

hmmmm..... :) happy.

I saw him today. It caused my heart to jump, died, and restarted again. I wanna see you smile when you see me. But, you looked away instead. I really do miss you love.

2009-04-06T01:08:00.003+08:00

What is wrong with me?
I keep having this feeling.
What have you done to me?

I look at her face, smiling, i looked for your face, and there, you were where i expected you to be.
Beside her.

Shit.

This is not doing me any good. I just hope. i really hope, that i wouldnt do anything that i dnt wish to do.

i want to get over it. i do. really. and theres no space for buts. I have to put an effort eh. But let me have my time k.

I sound like a bloody psychopath. Ranting on her own, having dilusions.

I only wish that i wouldnt feel this ache in my heart. It feels as if its been squeezed so tightly, that i couldnt breathe.

Let me breathe again.
Let me get over it.
Let me have the chance to look at his face, and not feel panicky, not feel the sudden rush of emotions, not feel the sudden need to just sit down and cry, not feel like i would just break into pieces, not feel like as if my legs juat cant hold on anymore, and i would fall, not feel like my heart had been squeezed till it punctures, not feel the sudden need to hug him.

Repair my shattered heart. Thats all i ask.

2009-04-03T07:28:00.005+08:00

I went to the Interact BBQ at National Service Resort and country club yesterday. it was fun..hahha.i had fun at the very least..it wasnt as vibrant as it was supposed to be, but i got to spend my time with the people i cared for.

Amongst those who went, were Vin and Matt; the organizers, Kavind, Prema, Farhan, Ramlan, Pat, Joey, Zul, Aidil, Zizzah, Wahidah, Rash, Maurice, Citran; whose wife is expecting a baby boy :) hehe, Dayah, Mel, Faizan, Nad, Yogi, and the lecturers. Sorry if i have missed out any names:)

We had the bbq started at arnd 6.30, or 7. Should have started erliear, to let tho charcoal burn..haha..but well, they didnt think of it.. Then, as the night goes on, i had fun bbq-ing satay, chicken wings, hotdogs, otak2, and crabsticks..haha..
then, after the lecturers have left, all have eaten their fill, we went inside and had the dance floor opened..Oh, i forgot to mention, Maurice wore a black V necked dress for the party..hahhaha..should have taken a pic eh..
They started dancing, and i had fun laughing away. I couldnt imagine myself dancing. I have NO idea how to dance...hahhaha...how im gonna miss u guys sia, now that ive graduated from ITE Simei...

We left at around 10.15, to catch the last shuttle bus that goes back to tanah merah. When we alighted at tanah merah, it turned out that Nad left her Hp on the bus! omg..then we had to call vin, to ask for his help to get it back wen the bus goes back into the CountryClub.
luckily she remembered before she got home. if not, gone case. haha...

I saw you, and i couldnt bring myself to look at you. It hurt so much to look at that face, knowing i had spent part of my life being with him. I couldnt breath right, and my heart couldnt stop jumping like its gonna leap out of my chest. I felt like doing something so stupid, so bitchy, so slutty, but i couldnt bring myself to do it. Ive missed you so much, and i yearn for ur touch, ur smile, ur lingering look,ur hugs, ur kisses, the way you would whisper in my ears cos you know of wat it would do to me. i saw you, and the world stopped for a moment. I couldnt bear to be in the same room as you. It just hurts so much. i saw you, and how i felt till yesterday all disappeared. I felt the longing soo badly.
and i saw her. iknow she has done no wrong, but i just felt this weird feeling. Im sorry for feeling this way, but thats how i feel.its like the green monster is reappearing. im sorry, its not your fault, its mine. im still hangin on to wat is not there anymore.
take care was the last thing i told him. and i mean it too.

2009-04-01T20:48:00.007+08:00

I know i shouldnt be feeling this way..i know very damn well that its supposed to be over..but i cant! urrghh....im sori to those whos gonna read this, or is reading, but im going full blast..haha...

FUCK! i tell ya! uurrgghhh! i dont know why, but onli now, after almost 1 and a half months later, im feeling soooo agitated and so restless....I WANNA SAY FUCK WITH UR SWEET WORDS AND YOUR LOVE.. FUUUCK! urrgghhhhh! shitshitshit! i hate u! i hate your blardy guts! i hate you to the core! aaaaaaaarrrrrggggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!

i hate you i hate you i hate you.

i hate you for doing wat you did. i hate you for making me feel so miserable.i hate you for making me feel miserable even wen we were together.i hate how you could dismiss my words like im no one.i hate you for not talking to me. i hate you for making me feel like im lower than her. i hate you for making me feel so hateful towards you. i hate you for your desicions, though i had to respect it. i hate you for not thinking of me. i hate you for not considering my feelings. i hate you for choosing her over me, though, i know, i know so very well, that you are going to say that theres nothing gg on with the two of you. im not blaming her. but from wat i observe, observe's the word k, not stalking, shes soo into her bf, and ur soo into her. i dont get you..i soo dont get you.

we were doing so fine, then one day, i broke down from the pressure that was building up, between us and due to ur lack of observation. You couldnt take it could you? you left me just like that. I felt so used. I felt so wasted, so left out. Im blaming it all on you now, cos this is wat i feel, how i have felt all this while. i may have pushed you to the brink with me wanting ur attention, but that wasnt so wrong was it? i just wanted you to call me once. just once. at least a text msg. but there was none. i always worried abt you. i did on that day. i just hope you know. i felt so left out. so abandoned. after that night, you were never the same.

I may sound like an overprotective bitch. a bloody slut of a girlfriend whos so protective of her bf nt gg out wit friends and all.. but if you noe the whole story, if you know how he had been to me, you would feel the same. ive never called to ask where is he, what is he doing, and whos he with. but he never cared. wen he's with her, he'll just forget. forget that im here still. forget that im waiting. Friends first eh...yeah..but not to the extend of just forgetting me totally. just one tiny lil msg saying that ur ok, but i waited like a bitch waiting for a bone to chew on. in vain i would say
.

FUCK i tell you. ive never acted out of line. Ive always tried my best to fullfill everythig u asked for. but u just got over me so easily eh.. dont say you had a very difficult time. i just wont believe that shit u wld give me. im still finding it so difficult to let go for ur info.

i look at your picture and i would think.why? i had gave up before you came along. then, you gave me hope. but you really crushed me. you stepped on me and squished me like the ciggs butts that u smoke. FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! i went against soo many of the principles, and laws that ive set up in my life. just for you. really, you... You broke my bloody damned heart into so many tiny shattered pieces that used to be just broken. Im just so tired now. Ive got a phobia. And its cos of u. U shattered my heart, and it caused me so much pain, that i cant face certain simple things in life. I cant bear to watch those who are so in love. I cant bear to watch movies that i used to love so much, cos it reminds me of u.. i sound so pathetic, but thats wat it came down to...

But i thank you. thank you so much for teaching me what i never used to know. I may hate you...but i love you..i loved you, and i still love you, thats why it hurts. it hurts so very badly. i felt so hurt then, but i still had hope. then, that incident happened. I felt more hurt. i tried to make it better. you just let go. i fell deeper into the well of despair. then, you let me loose. you totally dumped me. and after that, you just broke the most fragile thing i had left, which was alredy damaged.

I just hope that whoever that is meant to be by ur side, would take good care of you. understand wat i could not understand. reach to places where i did not get to. dont do to her wat you did to me please. i beg you. talk to her for god's sake! tell her how you feel.let her know wat you are thinking. let her explore you like how its meant to be. i regretted not trying harder.but its too late. you built a stone wall around yourself, especially against me.
take care my love. you'll always be my JJ.

2009-02-24T23:35:00.001+08:00

I ve got no say...I hate you for doing this...i really really hate you for doing this...but no matter what, i still love you...i love you with all my heart..you'll always be my pumkin..

1st day out

2008-11-09T12:23:00.006+08:00

Wowweee!

1st November '08
We met up at Orchard, he came 15mins late, cos he went to get me a RED ROSE!! heheh...then, we went jln2, looked for sum stuff..I tried so many new things...Naive lahh katekan..haha(mcm paham)we got Fried Mars balls, Jap Icecream; GreenTea flavour, Choc Milkshake, Also, Iced Coffee for me, and iced tea for him at Borders Cafe. He got me birthday presents!haahaha....2 heavy metal cds!hehehe..he so paid attention to wat i likes n hates...Its damn Gory sehh..but i like..

Went home at arnd 7 plus, he sent me up to my doorstep..hehe..

Went for the Youth event thingy called Breathe...Stayed till about 10..then, went off to meet him at Toa Payoh...He just finished hiss Aikido...went to McD..he ate a double cheese burger..then went to jalan2 at the park..spend sum time wit him...

Im superduper glad that ive met you..i had almost given up on meeting sumone who i could really call my bestfriend, whom i can laugh, play around with, joke and create a nuisance of myself infront of ..I really2 sayang you babe...

2008-10-31T20:11:00.009+08:00

Shahri n Maurice..just a candid pic

Zul Aunt's place

Random!

Pat n Shahri mkn

Playin the piano at Dayah's hs Family potrait at my house

Mel n Maurice...Cool it Mel..hee~

Me n Mel

Maurice n Me .. Wats wit the face boy?

Everyone else eating, Zwan stoinkin

At Zan's house
Dayah n Mel

Dayah's house

Everyone eating Nasi Minyak at my house

Hari Raya Pics of us gg Jalan Raya...
Thats most of it! haha..we had fun that day..Runnin in the rain and all..hee~

Hmm..im kinda feelin different these days..hopefully all goes well..*winkie!hee~

2008-10-30T20:42:00.002+08:00

Im kinda Dizzy these few days, ive no idea why..went to donate blood on last saturday..and since that day ive been having dizzy spells..with a special offer, a damn bloody throbing headache...haiyaaa...
and ive been superduper tired and its like my eyes are soo heavy all day...
Projects are iritating specimens!! so many of them! ive got Oncology, PCB, Behavioural Science, CDP, haiyaaa..... didnt noe 2nd year is so pain in the ass kinda hard!

1 gd thing, MY BIRTHDAY passed like half a mnth ago! haha..i got from mama a new LG KT520 phone! heheh...my old phone was like 5yrs old!but then, a few days later, it seems that theres a problem wit the software! and now i have to go all the way to vivo to do a software checkup and update...urrghh.. probably gg wit citi on this sunday...

saturday, gg to orchard for some presents shopping..should be interesting, cos orchard is soo not my place...

ouh yeahh..forgot to mention, i went to philippines! n it went soooo damn great! i got to noe others and like really went beyond my own limits..so im proud of myself!
i had a great time, especially with Citi, Hazwan, Jessica, Dayah, Faizan, Yogy and Nad..
you can read wat we went through from citi's blog, just go to links, and look for citi...
she have pics too! haha..dont need to write n upload so much pics..heee~

anw, im superduper tired nowadays, and ill see how i can cope...and with NAPFA coming, haiyaa..wanna get Gold also this year....See if i can make it...

iLL write again soon...how soon, i donnoe..maybe, in 2 days, in 2 mnths, ive no idea..so not promising anything!
Luvss!

umm...lost?

2008-09-21T06:49:00.003+08:00

okok...last time i checked, i blogged like 1 mnth back? hahaha...im kinda lost..cos theres so many things i want and need to write down...

RANDOM THINGS I WANNA WRITE:

- i still hate my sister!!! omg! she's always on my nerves! and her bf is still as irritating as ever!!
haiya..........

- Uncle Ishak pulled down my curtain hooks and put up a pole for new curtains...and put up a shelf for me!!hehehe...tanx Uncle Ishak...
so...till now, im still cleaning the mess, after shifting around the things on my table, cupboard, and new shelves....

- fasting since 1st of september...only missed 1 day...like 2 days ago....hahaha...

- Went out with Citi and Zwan and Aini to Sungei Road, then Arab street and then Chinatown, and then SGH, cos Citi was craving Mooncake..hahahah...so she bought DURIAN mooonnncake.....that was in uniform..ahaha

-then, went out again, to Jurong West, i went to the bazaar ramadhan....nth to buy...i onli bought kuih koswee....

- then, went out again, it was supposed to be me, citi and fad..but, hazwan muncul...so...its the 4 of us....we went to JE, went to Song and Song..i kinda familiar with JE now..hahah...then, we went to Chinatown, looking for dresses...Citi bought the Tube and dress, Fad bought dress, and long dress...WOW i tell you..they shop like hell! hahahah...i bought a bonjen....

-then, i went out woth Citi on a wednesday, accompany her to go change her passport picture, it turns out, she needs to make a whole new passport! wasted seh..haiyooooo....then we went to Bukit Btok, initially wanna perm her hair, but then, the aunty not home! dalah panas nk maut! haus seh...then we lepak under the block, ambik2 gambar....hahhaa...for the first time, i wore a shoe thats not black, or white or any dull boring color ive always been wearing..i wore yellow!!!hahahaha....

...

2008-08-03T22:40:00.002+08:00

Bleagghhh

Imissing ppl today...im not sure y, but i guess i do..hmm...Im missing Yan, Zati, Citi, Zwan, Aina, Nani, my dad, i guess some other ppl....but hmm...i feel different...
blleahhh...dats how i feel..

Other than that, im still damned2 angry with my sis...damn F****ng ugly dick head...uuurrrggh!!how dare u say all those things and feel no remorse at all! and u act like nothing has happened..i noe u dont ever read my blog right, so ill say it out now I HATE UR BF!!no wait..i dont hate him..I HATE YOU!! urghhhh!!!ive no idea wats going on in ur freakin head and i guess theres nothing much is there?! U are irresponsible and a selfish asshole! i kept praying that on that night, it would have been better if u left..i dont care where u would have stayed, but it would have been better..U broke her heart and when u did that, you broke MY heart...and ur words made it even worse...u had a cheek to ask if im angry woth you...of course i would say no! who in the right mind would say YES! im angry with u...Dumb Dickhead...uurghh!!

Ive finished IMH posting..and i loved it!!!hahah...im missing my patients..and it may be a possibility thit i wanna work there....another possibility is me gg to Saudi to work there...told Momma already..and she said y not...but i need to do my dip first...and i wanna take up arabic...i mean, it would be a shame right, gg there, being an arab by blood and not knowing my own native language...

IM FEELING SHITTY!! BLEAGGH!!

hmmmm...

2008-07-18T23:40:00.002+08:00

I havent been blogging..yeahh..i noe...bleagh...now while waiting for Unni n Ji to finish their 'art' project, ill blog..
I was kinda looking forward to joining the Nike+ Human Race, but its like too late now..i mean its like so close to the real date itself..i also wanted to join the Standard Chartered Run but dont think im ready for it..and i cant afford it yet..so y not wait for a few years more huh...hmmmmphh...
Came back from work today...last day at AngMoKio Community Hospital after 2 wks...next stop is IMH..grandMomma advised me to be carefull...haha..i mean yeahh..wat do u expect from the people there rite...
Im bored and Im sick...urghh...

I DIDNT STUDY!!

2008-06-04T08:48:00.002+08:00

PCA test is today n i didnt study

OMG! i got home from the library at arnd 8 plus...i wanted to study but delayed it a bit cos tired as ive been studying at the library since 10am!...so read my book..and started on PCA notes...couldnt really concentrate uh...wen i got the lappy at arnd 11 plus, looked at friendster, n other crap..then i was thinking of the movie Main Hoon Na, acted by ShahRukh Khan...My hero...Chehhh...hahaha...my granmoma gave me a picture of him she got when he came to Singapore once not long ago...Umm..if im not wrong the Bollywood Night Galla or smth...sponsored by Plasterglass Designs....but that was last time lah....hahah...-Continued- Then i remembered Om Shanti Om..cos Shasha recommended me to watch..so i studied while watching Om Shanti Om...then when that ended, i looked for Kabhi Alveda Naa Kehna...haha..seriously i was on movie marathon..n i didnt sleep the whole night..not a wink...hahahaah...n i seriously didnt study!....hmmmphh..we'll see how i fare for PCA..hahah..serves me right for not studying if i dont get high marks..hahaha...i mean, i noe i should be more responsible..or at least more concern about the paper today....im trying not to turn into Hazwan ... i noe..im bad right..but one thing abt hazwan is that he is auditory..n he can learn just by listening to the lecturer's lesson..im not so sure abt myself though...

Good Luck to me then...

hopesully..haha...

luvss all..

What happened...

2008-05-19T00:22:00.006+08:00

Momma's Day

On the 10th went to Nani's house...Left home at arnd 11 plus...and reached there arnd 1am?..haha..cant remember..too late already...Everyone slept already..so had to wake sumone up to open the gate..Nani woke up and from what i heard, momma almost fell asleep driving!
haha..my brother was at the front seat but he said he was frightened to say anything when he realized momma almost fell asleep...OMG! haha..

Next day, went to a seafood restaurant somewhere farfar away..like 1 hour plus2 journey by car..We had dinner, had a few laughs, and bought durian on the way back..i had fun..haha...went back on Sunday mrning..early2 mrning like 5 o'clock...

Interact

I realized that ive been jumping CCA since i joined ITE...I hate that as i am always consistent with what i get involve in...Im always commited and give my vey best..but, i guess i havent really found the correct CCA at that time...
i joined OAC at first nad stayed in it even though i find it crappy, at the same time, i joined rock climbing..haha...the first time i went, i stayed till around 8...and it was on a tuesday...i couldnt take it, and it was too tiring...from then, i didnt go again..Next would be ITE concert band...I went to a few practices but i skipped a few and the Bloody Hell teacher is such a toot in the head! i hate him and further more, i couldnt commit myself to going for evey practice on saturdays...so i quit that too...I was still in OAC, but then, i went for my Clinical Practice for 3 mnths and i skipped OAC too...then, by the end of the year, i quitted OAC too..for the first time in my Pri school to Sec school life, i ws CCA-less....i felt not complete without having anything to be commited to...

I took up Interact Club..i heard so many things from Hazwan and i was really interested in the things they do..and i joined...
I went for the Orientation camp..talk abt it later2 k...

Alumni Band

2008-05-01T22:44:00.004+08:00

Alumni Band

hmm..went for a few band practices...it was fun and all..met all my seniors and my batch...i was looking forward to playing for the concert..
but, i cant..
Im heart- broken! Momma said no...i've got no other words to describe how i feel...i dont even feel like going for the practices to help Shan-Shan out anymore...its like, i dont want to be there knowing that they are preparing for the concert, but im not...*(Sobs)
but this saturday have a practice,ill see if im going...last week i didnt go cos i had my Phase Test..
i guess mos of them knows the news already, and guess they must be shocked!i was so into band...hmmm..what can i say, momma has always been the one saying yes or no..im her doughter, and its her right to tell me...i noe..some ppl say to stand up to myself, but i cant..shes my momma and i know her...i donnoe what she'll do if i go against her...i have no say in this...seriously...

Longest run Ever!!!

2008-05-01T22:01:00.002+08:00

My Longest Run Ever!!!

I msged Unni -my sis- last night asking her if she wants to go for a run...she replied so late that i took my shower already..so i told her..nvm then...she replied saying she n kak Jihan going for a run at Mc Ritchie the next day...so i was like ok...she asked me along..so i said that i would only slow them down..cos...whenever i run around my estate, it took me half an hour to run a 3k route...she said its ok..so...i agreed to cum along...Meeting kak Jihan at 6 at Ang Mo Kio Mrt...i woke up at 4.30..i was sweating when i woke up due to the hot hot humid weather...urrgh...i couldnt get back to sleep..so i opened a pack of popcorn and read a book on the floor under the fan...Unni woke up and was angry cos i never sweep the floor..kinda ridiculous, but well, post sleep syndrome i guess..then we took our showers, pack our bags and left at abt 5.40? hmm...we reached there late, but kak Jihan wasnt there yet..so we bought our stuff at Cheers..
Once kak Jihan arrives, we took a bus and reached there abt 7 plus...changed to shorts and sport shoes and dumped our stuff at the lockers...
Stretched and ran for like a few metres..and dang! i was tired.....maybe the mornig air was kinda thick...then stopped to stretch again after the warm up...Then we sterted running...we ran and ran and ran....hmm...totally, i think it was about 15k run? hmm..longest run i ever ran!!!!haha..and im proud of it...though, we took stops here and there...climbed the tower, walked across the treetop walk, checked out guys? haha..nolah..only groups of 'chinonets' walking aroud like 'jakonis' who has never seen that many trees around them before...
We reached the starting/ending point at about 9.30/10 like dat...we changed wat was needed to be changed, but the toilet is like 'STINKY'!!!!Urggh!!!Foul and undescribable..what do people do in the toilet to make it that bad...*(shakes head)
We took a bus to Bukit Timah and ate ice cream at Island Creamery...Its D-E-L-I-C-I-O-U-S!!
I ate Black Forest n Nutella, Unni ate Reversi n Chocolate, n kak Jihan ate Strawberry sorbet n Chendol...haha...the flavours are wacky i tell you...no where else that you can get those flavours...Mmmm-Hmmmm.....

haha..then we took another bus to Ang Mo Kio..KaK Jihan needs new shoes!!her soles are missing!!!n i forgot to mention that she fell and scraped her knee...hmmm...
We went to different stores, but the product is either not good, or its too pricey..
In the end we decided that she buys them at Penin...Then, we heads to Song n Song..my favourite shop..haha...i found the sweater i had been looking for and it cotton!!!i bought it and its like 5 bucks!!i saw one at penin and it was close to 30 i think?Unni bought sweat pants and kak Jihan bought track pants...then, THIS FASHION, brwsed around, and saw some stuff but never bought anything...haha..but its damn huge sia!
then we headed towards Sembawang..Bought bubbleteas, and a new shop opened at the mrt station..since Momma is sick, we bought 3 packets of different noddles; all for 4.50..hmm..then we headed for ntuc, bought bread, and headed home!
My thighs,calves,and back were aching! but it was awesome!!
I seriously, want to do it again..no doubt...

Its been a long time..

2008-03-14T21:32:00.004+08:00

Sooo sori for not updating for so long...

No.1 Im Single

The reason is, hes one not fit for girls like me. His brain seems to be full of whatever shit it can be filled in.. Seriously, he never ever seems to think about his future..i asked him of what he wants to do in the future, his goals and all..but his answers were just crap about having kids and stuff...i asked him if he ever wants to move on to have a diploma and have a better life, and he said hes not bothered..What kind of man would he turn out to be?..One full of failures no doubt..
And one other thing he ever thinks about is having fun in bed. He said he wanted to change, be a better person.. I shouldnt have believed him..Sya, maybe ur right...i shouldnt believe in giving others a 2nd chance...I tried to help but it didnt change him one bit...Whatever..anyway, anyone who noes me, and had known him, stay away from that creep..

No.2 Attachment at TTSH

Hols ended on 7th of Jan 08...Started attachment...My CP lecturer was Mdm Phylis Tan..hahaxz...lots of reaction at that time...i got the shock of my life too...hahaxz..I was praying to avoid getting her..but dang..i got her...
Met her outside of Starbucks on the first day of attachment..i was also on the same group as the WSS students...so..got Ward 11B...at first she was a bit lenient..then.. kene warning to approach her for skills...she so much like momma..So damn fierce...at first, i thought shes just mad..but then i realize, she may be fierce n abit out of hand, but her nursing care, no one can do a better job...I still didnt want her voluntarily as my lecturer, but in sum ways, i was glad to have her as my lecturer...In feb, moved to medical ward; 5B..

She became more garang..hahaha..cannot imagine my fear of her..it was like wen i always got into trouble and wouldnt even want to be in the same cubicle as her..whenever shes around, we would ask the other students; "have you seen Mdm Tan?..Is she around? Where is she?"
hahaxz...we always worry that she would show up behind us and watch wat we were doing without us knowing that shes there...

I pissed her off a few times..but, what the heck..everyone does..Towards the end of the posting, she grew more hostile towards us..though we ourselves have our disputes, we tried not to involve her but that seemed to make her more brusque towards us...

Once, 2 students got into an unwanted situation..then we involved Miss Lim..She found out and she kinda complaint to me that we didnt turn to her for help..instead, looked for Miss Lim...I guess she felt hurt..i saw it in her eyes and heard it in her voice..But truthfully, SHEs our lecturer and we should have turned to her...well, at least, thats over...didnt thought that i could have survived CP 1.2 with her...but, i made it.hahaxz
Well, attachment is over..But, i still have 1 week of school..learning PCA n Biology...

No.3 Alumni Band

Shaun had enquired with me abt the alumni band and i told him i would join in..
A few weeks ago, Geena called me and asked me for my particulars as i was joining the alumni band..Now, im rethinking coz not everyone is joining the band...It would be boring then if theres no one else from our batch..hmm...we will see how it goes then..

Merry Christmas n A Happy New Year!!

2007-12-26T14:19:00.000+08:00

heii guys..wanna wish u guys a happy new year dats cuming up...hmm...schools starting soon!!Spend ur hols to the best u can!

Holidays are here..

2007-12-17T17:18:00.000+08:00

Holidays ? Hmmm...

Crap..Dats all i can say..I dont wanna post anything particular...not in the mood..Next time kk..

1 mnth Anniversary

2007-12-03T08:36:00.000+08:00

29th November 2007
1 mnth Anniversary

Coincidentally, our CMS lesson was cancelled, and SW1 cancelled too...Yeahh..we -Sya, Citi, Shasha, Hazwan, Douglas, and myself- were planning on our next day outing..We are going to be celebratig Sya belated bdae...hahazx...can elaborate later...
So A'an was waiting for me at the other table..playing his PSP...hmmmm...I brought him something...i had been wanting to give it to him for quite sumtime but just couldnT find the time yet..and, i felt heavy to part with it ah...but, i was willing..coz its the onli thing that he kinda needs at that moment..
Then, after planning with the rest, the decision was to be made that night...

We went to Toa Payoh and makan at Fork & Spoon..I tried the chicken noodle...He ate the Char Siew Chicken Rice...hhmm...nice...next time wanna eat, go there k...Then, we took our time and jalan2 at the central area...Belano is having a sale!!!i want the black denim jeans ah!!...
Then, after hours of jalan2, we stopped by his house..so his present were 2 roses in a bouquet...so sweet sia...it was deep red roses pulak tu..he asked me the night before waat i would like and i said nth..but suddenly a rose came into my mind...so i told him a rose would be enough...just 1 rose....
so i asked him why 2 roses..he said to go and figure it out..and i think i know why now...I luv u sayang..muuakkzz..tanx so much...

After that, he sent me home and that was one of the most romantic days of my life..hehee..hhmmm.tanx for that day sayang..

17th, 22nd, 23rd, 27th and 28th Nov '07

2007-12-03T07:51:00.000+08:00

The next day, 17th Nov, went out with A'an...We watched Game Plan!!hahahzx...it was damn funny ah...hahaxz....The Rock played the role of the father...also ate at banquet...then, jalan2 at the bazaar...i bought a red watch - the pompart watch-...then, we went to his house...Met his dad again..i meant that it was my 2nd time meeting his father...1st time was raya...

On 22rd Nov '07, Thursday, we kinda had a bad day...from the start of the day, our moods were alll not at our very best...We kinda had a fight between our group..Shasha and myself were kinda the middle people ah...we tried to resolve the problem and ended up being moody..haizz...Friday, we were all supposed to go out swimming coz saturday is Sya's bdae...but it was cancelled...
We ended our classes early and we -Sya, Hazel, Myself and A'an- went to Bugis...we walked aimlessly...and decided to go home..coz A'an had jamming earlier and brought his guitar along...It was too heavy and so we left..he wanted to send me home..but he wanted to go home and leavehis guitar first..he couldnT take it..too heavy..especially with his skinny built..
I reached home at abt 7 plus...

Then, next day, Friday 23Nov, i had to meet up with Ms Loreta and the rest of Blaze II guys..we were supposed to recieve our Certs for the camp..hahazx..and during the farewell, my reflection was read ou aloud..and whats more, my name was mentioned!..hahazx..but it was a nice feeling that sumone aknowledges ur work...Then, continued with PBL with Sya and Citi at the MLC..Aini went to the meeting without even informing me..How ignorant...but whateverlah eh...ur ass is not my prob...then, left skool to have late/ early dinner with Sya, Citi, and Douglas at KFC...Douglas met us halfway at locker on the way hm..A'an had his video course so he couldnt g home with me...At the end of our meal, sumthing happened...I bit my tongue..and,.....Sya had this crude idea to call A'an and scare him...She called and gave him a fright when she told him that i fainted..ahahahzx...he was shocked ah..what else...he asked sya to quickly call the ambulance and then passed the phone to Citi when she couldnT contrroll her laughter anymore...hahahazx...Citi also continued to scare him and he almost left his course to cum see me...hahahahzx...In the end, we admitted that it was just a joke...hhahaxz..poor sayang...
I left for home with them..and then, at 7 mama told us that we would be leaving for Nani's place..haizz...msged A'an and he was so sad that he couldnT meet me till Monday...Kesian...
At Kebun, i took a video of the calf..Didi gave birth to a black with white spots calf...then, Nani newly bred chickens..3 Hens and 1 rooster...also, i helped her clean out her fish pond..Turned out, out of 4 fishes, only left 1!!!..no one was there to help her clean out the pond..so luckily i helped if not, there were no more fish to keep!... Nani went to Ayer Hitam the week before and bought for me and Kakak SpongeBob and patrick's soft toys...they were the 'huggable' sizes...patrick's damn cute ah..but too bad..hes Kakak's and mine is Sponge Bob...too bad
Went home on Sunday morning..At abt 6 plus left Nani's place..Went to Sheng Siong...Reached home at abt 8 plus..mama went to her dental appointment and we stayed at home unpacking the groceries...At abt 1 plus went to FMSA with mama to collect progress report...
That was going to be the last FMSA meeting for this year!!!yeah!!wooohoo..ahhahazx...
A'an was so happy when i said that...he said that then, he could ask me out..hahahzx...perasaan..dat is if my mum allows...

Hmmmm.....On tuesday, 27th Oct, Zai...she said that she'll be leaving Singapre the next night..her flight is at 12..but she needs to be there at 10.45...i asked her to be safe and becareful in China...She said that she would be back arnd next year January..Haiizzzz...gonna miss u girl...giler2 kite dah ilang ah...hahazx..hopefully next year theres Blaze for us!!then we can all gather again... Take care of urself Nyonya!!!(my nickname for her coz she always wears shorts and lose shirts)

The next day, 28th Nov, as usual i called A'an at 7 to wake him up...He said ok2...he'll get up and bath....
abt an hour or two later, he msged me...He said that hes not going to school..Hes body is aching like hell...and he canT even get out of bed...then i told him..its ok...go and rest at home..
Then, we finished our class early that day...i told him that ill cum by to see him...kesian katenye...hahahzx... Went by Hazel's house to get A'an's baby -his guitar le- people say that i have plump hands which is good for massaging...So, i helped massaged his back lah...his papa told him not to leave the house coz he sick..so..he just sent me to the mrt station..poor sayang...

time flies by...

2007-12-02T17:50:00.000+08:00

Firstly, events on 16th Nov '07...

Firstly, the prelogue was...Me and a group of my friends planned to play a joke on a girl...She was considered our friend back then...but then, the joke got serious and the girl had no clue at all abt it...She kept telling us lies...though out the joke, and also when we confronted her abt it...We had realizied that she kept telling lies after lies to us from the beginning of our friendship...so when we could not take it anymore, we had to talk to her...

It was a friday..so we ended lesson at 12 noon...we asked her lots of qns..of all sorts...even when we were talking to her, she could still lie to us..we were utterly disappointed with her ah...We accepted her for who she is and though the rest shunt her, we took her in with us...i found out stuff i didnT ever imagined knowing...And it kinda involved with me...She said that it was a habit of hers and she felt insecured..thats why she had to keep the habit of telling lies....You promise to change...and i am hoping that u will...Now, we realize that u have kept urself away from us...We were hoping that u are much better now..We nvr knew who you were and i donT think we will ever know who you are...

During this 'confrontation', sumthing funny happened....As u know, in the toilets are no seats right...we were in the toilet for abt 2hrs seh...so Sya had the idea of siting on the sink...then, i got up, then Citi...then.....Shasha tried to get up but she couldnT...she trie twice but kept failing..hahahazx..It was funny ah..we were so serious then suddenly we laughed out loud...In the end, Citi had to pull her up...haizz...

Then, we were to go to a concert and it was held in skool..its the Exploration concert - and as usual i was supposed to have OAC..but i didnT go..felt guilty at that time...but it was the 1st time mind u..hahazxx...but then Sya and Citi tk jadi balik so we lepak at skool..in our uniforms...LOLxx..then...sumthing funny happened...Sya was sleeping and i was on the phone with A'an..Citi mentioned that she wanted to go to the toilet..i just waved to her to go..then, Sya got a call..Citi was stuck in the TOILET!!hahahzx...sumone locked her in..and so many times i told her not to go to the teacher's toilet..hahhazx....in the end, Sya had to call a teacher to get her out..hahahzx...

Then, a girl came up to me and asked if she can borrow my phone..of course i said sure...then, it turned out, she was Janna's friend - Janna's a friend from Blaze1 camp- Then, found out she was pissed cause of her Bridge leader trainig...Kinda pissed with this girl named Aqidah...i knew her from Blaze1 too..kinda knew how B i t c h y she could get...then, she stayed for abt an hour or so...chit chatting with me, Sya, and Citi..though they just met Janna, they seemed liked old friends and that was cool...We took pictures and they had to leave...They met A'an too...he came wearing his brown t-shirt which was abit stained with pink dye..and a brown blazer...smart lah tu..hahahzx...

At abt 7++ we went down to the forum...got our refreshments...a banana, a bottle of drink, a cupcake and a small sandwhich...we sat and watched a while....Got kinda bored and left at abt 8 plus...

On the way to the mrt station, i kinda had a small mishap..hahahzx...Sya wanted to show 'sumthing funny' and she did the 'kick with her legs in the air' stunt..and i was eating the tuna sandwhich....i was looking at her direction and i think i was laughing too hard to notice a drain infront of me!!So..what else!! i fell into the drain lah!!

Embaressing siak..luckily A'an was at the front and didnT see me fell..if not it would have been worse..hahaxz...Citi and Sya had a kick out of it ah..they couldT stop laughing even though we were already on the train...laughed till our eyes watered...hahazx...haiyo....the whole day was a mixture of sadness, anger and laughter...hhahzx..imagine that!!hahhazx...

Malas ah...

2007-11-14T11:25:00.000+08:00

eh..lazy ah to post2...haiya...skool is such a bore...glad to have close n best peeps to 'layan my kerenah' - meaning to just go with my flow..hahazx...Exams are just around the corner and im just catching up with my studies...The teacher is not helping..but i can be independent canT i?..LOLxx...hmm...

Wanna update abt the camp but just cant find the time to think abt wat to write..maybe by thet time i get the time to write, it would be next month!hahaxz..that's lame

I went to OAC for the last two weeks but i went alone...it seems the guys there are not that bad..im learning to be independent as now i go places alone..no one to accompany me at times..but when there are, i am glad and appreciate their accompaniment...Tanx guys!..

I learnt alot through Blaze camp...make new friends, be more open and louder..Aini asked me if i would want to join Bridge Leader but i told her..im not like her to make time for things in noe i cannot handle..it would be too tiring and it would clash with OAC...I would rather run and train rather than going for training to 'tebalkn muke' - meaning to be less shameful in public..

The other time, 3rd of November, we had our Phase test...i didnt even study coz my book was left in skool...then, we made up our mind to go out jalan2 and then have dinner....ShaSha, Citi-The Birthday Girl, Me n Han we went to jln2 at Town, then at abt 3 or 4 we left town and went to Beach road...Aini met us at lavender then we walked at the army market..i was looking for shops to make doggie-tags..coz my friend i think kinda lost my old one...we made doggie tags...me, aini n citi...then we ate dinner with Sya..Aini left early...

I LOVE RUNNING...hahazx..its true and milk does make me drunk....

beware when i drink milk!haha...

write again soon...

Continue?....

2007-11-05T00:52:00.000+08:00

Continuation...

So...it rained very heavily...and then..we hiked up onli 3/4 way..then Joanne slipped..Sprained her ankle and had difficulty walking...then..slowly we made our way up and waited for those left behind...then, we rested and made our way down..a few other people fell down too..Hidayat fell and an upright root scratched his abdomen..It bled and i got a bit worried when i saw the blood stains on his shirt...Joanne fell, Dee fell and i hellped her up and down...when we reached the 3/4 mark, me and Dee were last...But when we went down, i was the first..cause i was gripping her hand and asking her to follow my footsteps down the Mt..With her injured ankle and asthma, she proved herself more than i did...I was really proud of her even though i didnT know her before...Since that day, i became closer to those who i helped and helped me...I had difficulty going down as the rain was intefering with my vision..It rained so hard i canT see the path the rangers and facilitator took that i had to shout out for Rod - our facilitator - to wait as not onli me was lagging but those after Dee and me were so much far behind...
There were leeches stuck to necks, abdomen, legs, and other parts of the body..Luckily, i didnT get any stuck to my body...
I started to wear out a bit...but then, we walked all the way back to the resort...on foot!!!haizz...but after that, i was proud of myself that i didnT just sit and watch those injured being left alone with no one to help them...i had initiated and helped Dee out...
Actually, throughout the whole hike, i was thinnking if sumone...i had wanted to have sumone to complain to and have sumone comfort me and He popped into my mind...
When we got back to the resort, and had dinner and everything, i had the urge..very deep urge to just msg Him....I think i was getting used to the idea of him around...to sayang and him comforting me...as i had never had the chance of expressing my views, opinions, thoughts, and feelings out loud...
Alas, i forgot to activate my autoroam....but nvm, i had anticipated 3 days...

2nd day i probably write tmr or tuesday or smth k......

heiii...

2007-11-04T19:08:00.000+08:00

im at home..thinking of how to continue...

BLAZE II at kota tinggi

Friday, 26th October 2007, Day 1

Left my house at abt 5.45am and reached Yishun at 6am..waited for Zai.. and took bus 169 to tampines...on the way met Selamat....so we threesome took the bus..talking of nothing but emptiness...LOLzz...but then, reached school at about 7 am...we saw not that many people have arived...i called him..cause he asked me to wake him up at 7...he has school at 9...

i told him...i reached school already..he asked me to have a safe journey...and then...i gathered with the rest at the forum..bought toast from cafe 1..then,we had briefing....

we left school at about 8.45 am..and hes so cute....like a lil' boy ..he msged me...
"Syg, i da start rindu u ar...i nk cry, i sedih"
hahahzx...cute rite...those who dont understand, it means that he started to miss me already and feels like crying...when i read the msg, i wanted to laugh and cry at the same time...but, seriously ah...haizz..
Then, we reached kota tinggi at abt 11? canT remember...but..then, we changed, had a light lunch, changed for hiking Mt Panti...

During the hike, it was great.....just that..........half way through, it rained! Not normal down-pour..but the damn heavy one...urgghh!!!bcause of that, we could only hike up 3/4 way....so sad rite..but it was for our own good ah..
haiya..no time to write again..nvm..ill continue soon....

im tired..but veryvery happy

2007-11-01T20:10:00.000+08:00

you are a very sweet sweet guy and i luv u veryvery much..thank you for being here with me and though we may not have much in common, i dont know why, but we understand each other perfectly.....

What happened?

2007-10-31T20:36:00.000+08:00

I first met him wen he came along with a friend of mine(lets just call her Nini) to jln2 at Geylang during Puasa time...Me n my friends thought confirm these kids have sumthing going on..then...again n again he hang out with us..we as a grp liked him as a friend...i was like any other member in the group...then, AidilFitri came, and all of us went out jln raya on the 16th october as a group...we thought everything was normal..i and Nini's friend, coincedentaly wore the same colour of attire..we took pictures and i was to take a pic with him....we all realized that Nini was abit jealous..and she kinda hated the fact that i took pictures with him...(anw, there was nothing going on between the both of them)..then, at that time, i just thought of him as a friend...

Then, we heard of things that we knew were going to happen no matter wat coz my friend has a habit of doing it..on a friday, i think on the 19th, Sya asked me, if i wanted to kenal with a guy..as usual, i gave excuses and didnT say anything abt the offer...then, on the monday, Sya asked again if i wanted to get to noe a guy..then, she said
"but, hes ur friend" ..in my mind, i went"hmmmm??"
she told me it was Nini's friend...i was like "ok........."at that time, i didnt noe wat to think coz i didnt want to be in a relationship especially with my friend's friend....then, they say y not just try...i didnt need to be close to him..just be friends first..
we all went to tamp to look for wallet sepasang...then we ate dinner at long john silver..though i wasnt hungry..then......the next day came as a deep deep shock to me and it had brought all the probs coming..

i had wanted to noe wat the commotion between my friends were..i didnt noe that the issue they were talking about was that serious..they said they would tell me later..i said ok....but at lunch, He came and had lunch with us..luckily i had finished my lunch..if not i would have bleched it all out....Sya asked a question that i would not have ever thought of..but, when he replied to Sya's question, i just couldnT look at him..i kept drinking my bandung and stared out of the window..then, it was close to 1 and we had to get back to class...i just shook his hand and left with my friends...
in class, he msged me...asking me to forgive him...i didnt reply him on both times he msged me...he gave up and msg Sya asking if i was angry with him...i wasnT angry..just plain shock...
One story led to another...i had to ask sumthing i nvr would have imagined talking about...but, i managed to ask it though it was not really wat we wanted to noe...i had to be more speceific....then, i msged him that nite asking abt it..and he said no..i was kinda relieved..but he thought i was angry with him...i told him i wasnt the type to judge ppl...i noe that what he had done in the past was veryvery wrong but now, he is trying to change...and i was glad..i started to really like him from then on....but, from there, there were more stories and it really confused me..but, i didnt believe the one who kept telling those different stories...

as the days go by, the more attached i was to him and vice-versa...on the 26th, i was to go for a camp at kota tinggi in malaysia.....it was Blaze II...the day before, he msged me saying that he had finished class at 1..and he was going home first....then i said ok...but then, it turns out, he would be cumin back to skool just to pick me up....i argued with him...but he replied saying that he would miss me and wanted to see for the last time before i leave for m'syia..that was so sweet of him though..

the next day, i msged him b4 i left for kota tinggi..and he said that he has started to fall in love with me...i didnT reply to that msg coz i was shock and at a lost of words....

i cant continue now k...but one thing for sure is, im really glad whatever had happened, had happened.....

my birthday..

2007-10-31T20:04:00.000+08:00

my birthday was on the 19th...but sadly, i didnt celebrate it that day...i reached home quite late..and, my sis said she wanted to go for a run after she came back from jln raye..but i waited for her in my tights and t-shirt..till 11 plus then she came back...sianzz..but then, my mum went to johor and came back damn late till i didnt see her the whole day...

next day, nth happened....turned out my mum bought cake..but it was not cut till the 23rd...a day after my sis birthday...hahahzx..but it was nice..but i had no appetite..couse something happened..later i explain..

Happenings

2007-10-31T00:41:00.000+08:00

i got to noe sum1...n went for camp..the details i cant write out yet....but i can asure u its damn lots of fun n laughter...

Went out again..

2007-10-17T07:27:00.000+08:00

i went out with my friends yesterday...it was tiring, but FUN! hahahzx....Hazwan, Aisyah, Aini, me, and a guy named Hans..Citi was supposed to follow but, at last minute her dad called her and asked her to Raya with him at Johor....

Actually i had a hard time confirming wether i can join them the next day or not..It goes like this...I told my momma that my friends wanna come over then jokingly, she asked me to stay at home..then i argued abit, and she gave in..then, my father called me...he asked me if my brother and me could jalan raya with him the next day..the same day i was going out with my friends...then i asked my momma if i could go..instantly, she got worked up...she said no! and i argued saying that i would be with his family as well...but she just kept quiet..knowing defeat, i left her room..Then i was outside, when my sis came home..she tried to talk to my momma also but to no avail...in the end, i went to sleep coz i was so mad...

that night, my friends and i were confused as to wether i could go out with them or not..we spent abt 1 hr just thinking of what if's....if i could go, what we are going to wear, if i could go, whos house to go first...then,i asked my momma if i could go she didnt reply but just walked away..then i waited till she left the house and my sis said to call her and ask again..i asked her abt 1 hr after she left the house..and she kinda said yes..only that she was trying to sound angry at me..haahhzx.

then....i left at about 12 and we went to jurong first, a few houses, then Hans's house, then my house...then they left abt 10pm..it was tiring but i had fun...
tanx u guys!...luv ya!...

selamat hari raya!!

2007-10-16T09:00:00.000+08:00

Salam Aidilfitri kepada semua...Selamat Hari Raya to all...

I went to My grandmomma's house in Johor, Pekan Nanas after praying at the mosque on the first day of raya...it was fun lah..but it was in the kampung so not mush to do..nvr go jln2..hahahzx..but i get to meet all of my family members... :)

then, on the 2nd day of raya, i went to my grandmother's house (my father's mum) and we all went out together...it was fun coz it had been a long time since i had met them all..i went out with my cuzin, Yahya, his mum,dad, my father, and my siblings....then, we went to about 12 houses?...not sure..but by the time it was thelast house, i was already sleeping on my cuzin's sofa...it was about 12+ am when i reached home...well at least i get to spend time with my dad and family...its kinda difficult to get the chance to meet them..well, cause i have a bit of problem at home....

but, neverhteless, it had been fun..

hei..

2007-10-12T22:35:00.000+08:00

sori it took me so long to post this...I couldnT log on cos the page just wouldnT show up...But, anw, i went for my Blaze II camp; Theory part..And it was damn happening ah...hahahzx...i had lots of fun and i met sumone who i wouldnT ever dream of,,,and heS just Woooo¬¬¬¬hahahzx..anw,i canT write everything now..but when i have the time, ill write everything aites...

on the way back

2007-09-26T08:36:00.000+08:00

after using the comp at skool, it turned out he was waiting for me to go home with me..then i was like ok........then me, my firnd and him took a train back together...and guess wat....he couldnT stop talking.....annoying seh..but watever lah...he told me of his lifestory..his ambitions of starting a business selling different kinds of pau..imagine that..then talked about his silat and his problems about his mum.....then wen he wanted to alight the train, he actually wanted to shake my hand but instead i just gave him a high-5..ahazx...then like nobody's business, he asked if he can kiss me...CRAZY!!!! mcm tk tau malu....then, i nvr respond, he just left...then, there was this malay guy sitting infront of me..he keep looking up and i think he knew wat i was thinking.."that guy was too over and like as if she would want him to kiss her"...ahahaahzx...then he also had this habit of saying "rock never die!!" or watever crap....BLOODY HELL LAH...irritating specimen... hopefully i wonT see him till whenever....

just another post..

2007-09-21T14:03:00.000+08:00

now at skool...supposedly, i had a briefing at 12 noon..but then i waited for my friend, A, at Tanah Merah mrt for her at 11.20...she didnT turn up..then, i waited till 12..n i knew i was late...then i took the train to Simei and called her..she said she was at Eunos.."crap!" i told myself..then i told her ill wait for her in skool..also she didnT turn up..then i called her at 12.45 and she said sheS in the library...i told myself again "CRAPPY SHIT LAH!" haiyya..just relax..im fasting...then it turned out that my camp has two parts..one is to stay in skool on the 8-9 of october...when im still fasting!..haiya...then, 2nd part is to go to kota-tinggi in late october..dat would be fun!...so i guess there wasnT much that i missed lah..

Then it turns out that she came to skool with sumone i had not want to meet in the first place...ThereS this guy..lets say his name is J...supposedly, i went to a camp abt a few mnths ago..then on the last nite, he saw me..then, the next day, we went home taking the sam train together..then, it seems he liked me... then he asked for my no. and actually wanted to send me home..but i said no..i can get back on my own..but then, i think i accidently gave the wrong no..then he msg me at friendster a few days later telling me that a phillipino woman had picked up the phone..ahahzx..i told him i wam so sory..but them unfortunately, i wasnT interested in BGR..then i replied him and told him i think that he is too sweet for my own taste and that heS not my type..then he replied saying its ok but we can still stay as friends..i told him ok..then..a few weeks later, he msg me asking if i wanted to go watch a movie with him...but i unfortunately, had to go to Johor that weekend as per usual...then i chevked J bdae, and it was on the day he asked me out!..i send him a comment saying that it was nice of him to ask me to share his bdae with him...then, later on, a few weeks later, i had a class in skool <> and i walked pass him.he seemed so happy.ahhazx..my friend, A, didnT recognise him from the camp and asked me who he was..i asked her if she remembered him from camp and she said no..then i explained to him..then she exclaimed that he was cute..ahhazx..then i told her that if she wants his no, i can give it to her..then that nite i gave her his no..next moring, it turns out that he actually asked for me..she said he didnT entertain her ;instead, asking abt me..aahzx...than, she asked me if he has any chance with me..it seems he still hadnT given up trying to court me...hahaxzx..then, that nite, he msg me asking if i had forgotten him and y i nvr msg him anymore..then i told him that i really wasnT in the BGR kinda mood..then told him that i really wasnT interested..he replied that nite saying that he didnT mean to put it in that way..instead, it makes it sound that heS desperate..then i said im so sori..and we can still be friends...then, he still could say in the end...."if you're free go out with me"...haiya..this guy really doesnT give up...then, i looked through his photos...and i saw his ca!!it was extremely B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L!!!I fell in luv with the cat..ahhazx

2006-08-26T19:11:00.000+08:00

im so so so so sori guys...my comp at home cant run..so im currently skipping lots of dates of blogging..dats so sad rite..hahaz...
racial harmony day...national day...and lots more...

Im freakiN tireD of all thE things thAt keeP repeatinG over N over agaiN..

2006-06-28T09:07:00.000+08:00

im givinG up once again....ill write again soon..

ContinuatioN....

2006-06-16T16:46:00.000+08:00

I mentioned something about weddings right?..but i feel like writing down about what i did before that all hapened....but it will be long...very long...hahazx...

So i wrote down about Mamu's wedding on the 1st of April...then, events following that, we have our speech day,7th april, then sports day heats..and sports day,18th april, all of which i have described on 22nd of April's post..hahazx..then, when comes to May, we have our mid- year exams...and in the middle of our papers, we had an incident...Zati's mother passed away...My MSN was put 'out for a jog', then, i left the house and went jogging lah..then, when i came back, there was like a few people trying to get me..Yi Jun put messages like "Huda when ur back please reply me"..or something like that...then, Aina also..and whoeverlah..then i found out from Yi Jun that her mum passed away..then i got all busy, and called Izyan, then Aina asked me what happened, and Ily, and Raidah, and Claudya, or whoeverlah..can't remember...then i was told that they are going to kebumikan the next day. We were having a Literature paper in the morning, and Science paper 3 in the 2nd half of the day...so the Additional maths students who doesnt have Lit paper, went to her grandmothers house in the morning, and only me was wearing a tudung. Feel so malu..hahzx..but at least i feel comfortable... then, we went there, waited till her mum finished her got bathed, and then when they brought out the body, i cried..i cant help it..I feel saddened by the fact that i cannot meet her mother anymore, the person who was so kind, and so gentle, another part of me cried because i failed to see her for the last time...I was supposed to follow then to the hospital to ziarah her mother...but then, i suddenly remembered that my Ez-link card was with my older sister...haizz.. then, i didnt go..that was the time i was supposed to visit her...but, alas, i cant...then when they were abt to sembahyangkan allahyaarham ibunye Zati, we were to leave for school...some have left earlier with Mrs Loy and Mr Sim... Izyan,Me, Ili, Yi Jun, and some others reached school when they have already started the paper..but we came in before the 1/2 hour limit...so we sat and did our paper...but i couldnt concentrate..so did Izyan, and Erma...**** I also kept thinkin of Momma...haiz..remembered all the times we couldnt make up..and ill end up crying all alone in the dark, trying to reach her...and trying to tell her things i've never told anyone...`` MoMMa, I LOVE YOU`` ..Then, after our paper, i went back to her grandmother's house, and then, went back home..

after that, nothing special...go tailor at kembangan or paya lebar make bride maid's dress..then, ...dotsdotsdots......On he 29th of May, had Mother Tongue Paper...boleh di katekan susah lah...kosa kata mcm siak jek..words nk pakai semua chim2...nasib ah..doa banyak-banyak......

NEXT, BALLOON HAT FESTIVAL ...hahazx...it was on 4th April ...canT believe i actually went to the Fest....thought Momma wonT let me...but, hahazx..met Songet infront of Semb.pri. and walked to skool together....helped them pack, Boye was also there..and jorrie also..Clauds, and many more...then, went, shouted, had fun....screamed, doing actions like "Y . M . C . A"..LOLxxxx...ahahzx...we won 1st for costume, and 2nd for cheoography(donnoe how to spell ah...)Hahahzxxx...reach skool..and have to accompany Songet go TOILET!!hahahzxxxactually i also need go..then, we went to Mc..and Jia Wen practically forced me to stay and not go outside to sit with Songet they all...she blanja eat meal...lolxx...then Songet watch X-men 2 with friends..and i walked back with Boye and Jia wenn after sending de friend at bus interchange...

ReconstructioN of mY bloGGie...

2006-06-15T04:34:00.000+08:00

okies... its 4:32 in the morning...i finished changing my bloggie's skin... now i can start posting and updating again...but i have to catch up since april 22...ill write soon...theres lots to write abt...like mamu's wedding...and kak sakinah's wedding..and ballon hat fest...and so on...
so many things to write on..ill update soon..need get rest!!..

and met my dad at the wedding......reminds me...haizz....dis pic is all i have..lolzx...

RecounTs of MeMories....

2006-05-28T01:56:00.000+08:00

April 22...the day i last wrote in my bolGGie...
ill continue from there then..but it will take some time...

Firstly, i didnt mention in my last post that my uncle have already gotten married..hahax...wat a happy occasion..he got officialy married on 30th of March... by that time, my brothers were not in Singapore...They were in Indonesia...They had their flight on 25th of March...Those ppl im close with would noe why..Anyway, it was held at my house. And people came, ate and left.It ended quite late, and we had so clean and keep all the decorations, and wash plates and dishes....etc...even the groom helped out..HahaX...then,on the Saturday, 1st April, the wedding ceremony is held at a hotel; Shangri-La Hotel...It was in the evening..but of course we had to come early to prepare the for the dinner...Ribbons, Roses -lots of them..big ones from India, small ones from Malaysia...- rose petals, a flower girl;the brides daughter...,gowns, dresses, high heel shoes, make up, and so on...Around 7pm, we started the dinner. Guests started coming, and soon, after the bride and groom has sat down, they served the appetizers, a salad if im not wrong..then, we they served the main course, which is a kind of roasted fillet, and then, the kids were kinda shock to see fish served in this manner, and they started poking the food..hahazx..Especially Hafiz..he said it was nice at first..but then he got sick of the fishy taste and left half of it uneaten..AND, during the main course, smth i really hate my momma for doing...u wanna noe too? ill give a brief description...u were sitting down eating ur main course, and ur mom comes to u and asks u to move to another table. What does that show you?..it must have meant something right?..well other thn that i cannot tell..its kinda secret..lolzx..then, we ate soup, and desert was a kind of pudding, with corn cream all around, and vanilla ice cream on the top..it tasted so sweet...my smaller cuzins, the kids, tasted it and played around with the ice cream as it is melting cause the pudding is warm...hahazx...in the end, they didnt even finish the pudding...then, Shasha's stokings keep rolling down, and i have to keep bringing her to the toilet to help her pull it up again...hahahzx..so funny..then, had to sit at the welcoming table, and wait for the guests to come...till 8, theres still people coming in... then, when everythings done, groom N bride cut cake, and picture taking time..our family didnt take cause we were supposed to take after the dinner...but, my momma, she wanted to leave straight away... never even give us the chance to say proper goodbye..haizz..me and kakak rush upstairs and grabbed our things and just took the lift down to the ball room looking for our momma..then, we took the chance to say goodbye to the ppl....i was so angry with the way she act..even my garandmomma was angry...I mean, if she wants so much to be with "him", then, dont drag us in!!!...URGH!!!ive already said earlier that the groom might be booking another room for us..but, my mother wouldnt listen...she would rather follow his butt! and go home before we could even say goodbye..WHAT THE HELL!!!! Sometimes the way she acts make me wanna hate her..WHAT IS HER PROBLEM?!well, then we sulked our way with momma..and then, suddenly she changed her mind, and said that we would take the cab...Me and my sis were like "WHAT THE HELLL?!" She scolded us when i said i wanted to stay..."You want to take the taxi home when you have a ride home?!"..to me, its scary enough to oget scolding in public...so i just kept quiet..then, this is wat happens.....SHit sia!...ape ape ah...malas nk layan..dah biase dengan perangai macam gini...(whatever ah..lazy to entertain..used to this attitude already..)...Then, she kinda push back and forth to whether to take his offer of the lift home...I was like "Puhleease...you are doing this in front of his wife? and your children???"....I DONT GIVE A DAMN!!!...
In the end, the wife and him said they dont mind sending us home, and we eventually reached home.....

YOU HAVE YOUR OWN DAMN PROBLEMS... SO, DON'T GET ME INVOLVED!!!!

Till now, im still angry about it..i dont get to take family pictures, and i dont get my roses, and i dont get to stay at the hotel, and i dont get the cake, and i dont get to be with my GrandMoMMa...Haizz... never mind..it has passed anyway.. then, we took his car home, and soon after that, i chatted with my grandmomma, and well, at least she calmed me a lil' bit... but, i still think she could have known how to be more mannered..and think about what other people are feeling...

updatin my new bloGGie

2006-04-23T03:29:00.002+08:00

okies...ill leave my blog as it its now..its already so late..even now,the blog has problems but ill try to get rid of it.. its has been so long and i miss writing in my blog..a lot happened for de past few months..
our Speech day was on the 1st of April..dat was de day we had our last performance..by de way, i failed to play my Solo correctly on my last performance..
Sobx*..='(..aniways..im still happy that we had a great time that noght..we played our best and did the best we could..we said our goodbyes and farewells.. but i cant seem to stop goin back to the band room even after our official stepping down on the 18th of Aptil; our Sports day too..
Speaking of Sports day, we all WON!! Especially when those 4E2 tried to act as if they were surely win cause they had ordered pizzas even before they got the results..serve them right!haha!!in the end they lost! they try to make us look bad in the end they lose..i took part in Long Jump and got 2nd!! even though 1st time try i still get 2nd.hahax..den i took part in 100m event and 1500m and 4x100m relay..the 100m i was supposed to be in the finals but it turned out that those who took de reheats got into the finals while i got kicked out together with iffah..so sad..but nvr mind..hahaz...1500m, i was 5th!!compared to the rest..at least i tried my best... den relay, together with Ili, Yi Jun..and diamanta..we all tried our best..but we still lost..hahax..at least we won over champion for boys, that is Ismail..and class champion..we were so happy that dya.. den we celebrated the next day in class..we had pizzas.. and champagne..and coke..and chocolate..hahaz..so much FuN..tanx Mrs Loy, and Ms Yap!!
Aniway,i have gotten over dat irritating freak..and i noticed that he has changeed since leaving the band..even though he was left with only a few weeks to stepping down, he maybe felt that he has had enough of the band..but he missed so much since he left..TOO BAD!!..
i have made a lil' progress in trying to study..im still tryin to be better in my studies..Yi Jun helped me alot in getting me to get movin'..if u get wat i mean..hahax..tanx alot mate!..u motivate me to study!..Love Ya!..
Aniways, talkin about studying, theres someone i noe who doesnt want to study..he worries me..i care alot for him..he intents to go for an audition for somethin..but he worries me 'cause he does'nt want to study..and hes doin his N lvls dis year..and just the other day, on thursday, he told me he got suspended for that day cause he got into trouble with the VP on Wednesday..his parents came down and he was to get his canning on Friday.. But wen i spoke to him, he said he didnt get t the cane yet..ill post wat i spoke to him abt..

[01:46:13 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: wei...
[01:46:41 PM] ~ ------ ~: yesh
[01:46:49 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: i need tell u somethin
[01:46:52 PM] ~ ------ ~: yupp
[01:46:55 PM] ~ ------ ~: wad thing??
[01:46:59 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: but i scared later u sad
[01:47:09 PM] ~ ------ ~: nvm lahh
[01:47:12 PM] ~ ------ ~: just say it lorz..
[01:47:22 PM] ~ ------ ~: how can sad can it be..
[01:47:22 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: i got talk to ms tan just now,,
[01:47:23 PM] ~ ------ ~: hahahaa
[01:47:26 PM] ~ ------ ~: yahh
[01:47:44 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: den she say she don wan let u go for de
audithion
[01:47:45 PM] ~ ------ ~: the audition thingy ahh
[01:47:50 PM] ~ ------ ~: i noe i noe..
[01:47:51 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: yah,..
[01:48:04 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: u not sad bah..?
[01:48:07 PM] ~ ------ ~: wait huh. i call her now..
[01:48:13 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: ??
[01:48:16 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: for wat?
[01:49:36 PM] ~ ------ ~: ask her again lorz..
[01:49:54 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: wat she say?
[01:49:56 PM] ~ ------ ~: she say coz i said somehting to mrs chew..
but it wasn't mi who is the one saying it loe..
[01:49:58 PM] ~ ------ ~: hahaa
[01:50:02 PM] ~ ------ ~: i haven call yet
[01:50:03 PM] ~ ------ ~: wait lah
[01:50:06 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: okok..
[01:57:29 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: done?
[01:57:44 PM] ~ ------ ~: she's in the meeting..
[01:57:49 PM] ~ ------ ~: mon dan she will tell mi
[01:58:08 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: wat u mean bt u got say smthn to mrs
chew?
[01:58:14 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: smthn rude ah?
[01:58:56 PM]~ ----- ~: no lahh...
[01:59:01 PM] ~ ------ ~: it wasn mi ..
[01:59:11 PM] ~ ------ ~: my classmates
[01:59:41 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: i tried to side with u but she really wan
u to be off de audition..
[01:59:46 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: so how?
[01:59:56 PM] ~ ------ ~: mon dan see how lorz..
[01:59:56 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: u wan prove to her u can be good?
[02:00:07 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: i told u to study ..u don wan
[02:00:21 PM] ~ ------ ~: if really out ahh.. i will go crazy the next
day in school ahh
[02:00:24 PM] ~ ------ ~: hahaaa..
[02:00:31 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: told u already..
[02:00:39 PM] ~ ------ ~: its not about wanting to study not ..
haiyoo.. misunderstanding lorz..
[02:01:09 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: so..dis moe eh..cannot playplay..
[02:01:18 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: u better study hor...
[02:02:19 PM] ~ ------ ~: yepp..
[02:02:27 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: how was de canning?
[02:02:35 PM] ~ ------ ~: haven cane yet..
[02:02:38 PM] ~ ------ ~: still waiting ehh
[02:02:41 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: den wen?
[02:02:50 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: can still say still waiting..
[02:02:53 PM] ~ ------ ~: aiyaa.. the cane just wwack wack .. don
worry ahh..
[02:03:07 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: don worry?? ?
[02:03:11 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: pain leh..
[02:03:19 PM] ~ ------ ~: 1st time like ppl kick your butt.. second
time like the bicycle buang onto you ..
[02:03:26 PM] ~ ------ ~: thats all mahz .. hahahha!!!
[02:03:37 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: how u noe..
[02:03:44 PM] ~ ------ ~: nahh.. its a joke..
[02:03:45 PM] ~ SonGet ~: hahaa
[02:03:51 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: if use de thick cane..i wonder how u goin
to sit down
[02:05:10 PM] ~ ------ ~: aiyaa.. nvm de lahh..
[02:05:12 PM] ~ ------ ~: lie down lorz..
[02:05:14 PM] ~ ------ ~: better
[02:05:16 PM] ~ ------ ~: jajaa
[02:05:18 PM] ~ ------ ~: hahah!!
[02:05:32 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: u can still joke..
[02:05:41 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: i scared for u leh..
[02:05:50 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: not only de canning..but de ausition
[02:05:54 PM] ~ ------ ~: don worry.. we muz always look onto the
bright side..
[02:06:41 PM] ~ ------ ~: the canning just treat it as punishment..
the audition.. just try my luck.. thats all lorz.. i don
gif so much hope in the audition. i noe i won mnake it
.. so there's nothing much to worry bout..
[02:06:43 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: u make sure...
[02:07:09 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: how u noe u wont make it??
[02:07:14 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: u will nvr noe
[02:07:32 PM] ~ ------ ~: i just noe. hahaa
[02:07:44 PM] ~ ------ ~: don put so much hope in it..
[02:07:47 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: can still laugh...
[02:07:54 PM] ~ ------ ~: okay lorz..
[02:07:56 PM] ~ ------ ~: dan i cry then
[02:08:11 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: ....lame lah u..
[02:08:54 PM] ~ ------ ~: correct wad.. hahaaa..
[02:09:39 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: u say u will go crazy if u nvr go..might
as well don go if u noe u wont get it..
[02:10:02 PM] ~ ------ ~: just try lahh... that audition act as a
drive to me..
[02:10:21 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: den ..u ah ...
[02:10:32 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: de head siao siao wan..
[02:10:33 PM] ~ ------ ~: i will go crazy is becoz of that choco
thingy i can't go for the audition.
[02:10:36 PM] ~ ------ ~: its stupid ahh
[02:10:46 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: ouh...
[02:10:51 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: hah...
[02:11:01 PM] ~ ------ ~: haiyooo
[02:11:15 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: i donnoe wat to say to u anymore..
[02:11:26 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: don wan to study..
[02:11:26 PM] ~ ------ ~: hahhaaa
[02:11:29 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: get in trouble..
[02:11:33 PM] ~ ------ ~: study so boring ahh...
[02:11:48 PM] ~ ------ ~: get into trouble at least i got somehting to
do in school mahz..
[02:11:55 PM] ~ SonGet ~: better dan sit inside class do nothing
[02:12:00 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: so boring..of course lah..but its for ur
future bah..
[02:12:28 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: ur head get into trouble got smthn to
do...
[02:13:36 PM] ~ ------ ~: hahaa.
[02:13:37 PM] ~ ------ ~: kidding lahh
[02:15:06 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: how u goin to move on with life.....
[02:15:23 PM] ~ ------ ~: dunno ehh
[02:15:28 PM] ~ ------ ~: there;s no life for me
[02:16:54 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: den do smthn to let u have de life lor...
[02:17:10 PM] ~ ------ ~: hahaaa..
[02:17:20 PM] ~ ------ ~: don no lahh... i dunno wad to do
[02:17:41 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: study..spend time doin somethin good...
[02:18:32 PM] ~ ------ ~: do nothing is something good
[02:19:43 PM] [N.u.r.u.r.u: den don create trouble

dats wat we talked about..dumb rite?? so silly dis boy..sa gua..only wan to play..how to go for the audition thingy... haiya...now donnoe if he can go or not lor..just pray for him..
den, for the past few days, ive been coming home late cause we have projects and i went to study and everythin..but it seems momma wont believe me..she used to say that if i wan to come home late msg her to tell her ill becomin home late..but wen i msg her or call her, den she will scream and scold me..it seems not fair..at least i try to msg her..even though i have no phone..so sad..
on Tuesday, 18th APril, ws the Sports Day, den after that i went to Causeway to jln2.den went to Izyan's house with Asha,Yi Jun, and Muna to do the Green Week project..but den it was abt 7:30pm wen i left Izyans house..den i msg my mom to tell her im comin home..but then on our way home we accidently strayed till Yishun ..den again, i msg my mother to tell her where i am..den yi jun called her fahter to fetch us..he came abt 8 plus..but wen i reached home, my mom started to scold me..i felt so disheartened and so hurt..i cried that night till my eyes was puffy de next day..den dat day i stayed out to study with Yi Jun at Moss Burger after school...den wen i came home, my mother scolded me again..it continued everyday..from Tuesday till today..even now, my mother just scolded me and said that i would fall asleep in religious class...i'de nvr intentionaly sleep one..it wouldnt happen unless my teacher is too boring..like always..
I ts already past 5 :30 in the morning.. i have class later..hahaZ..
Im feeling so lonely withou his acompaniment and i feel so lost without him..with him, i can talk and laugh..but, its too bad ,im outa his league..hahaX...so ill leave you all to read all this..tataZ and see ya around..

NeW bLoGGie...

2006-04-21T15:26:00.000+08:00

my last blog got some probs..den i had to create a new one..so...dis is it...ill try to post my thoughts and feelins in it if i have de time..